I leapt out of bed at 7am this morning, wondering what had just happened.
My body, surprisingly, is fine. Blistered, marathoned feet, aching trapezius muscles aside, my mutant healing powers must have took care of the rest.
My mind, on the other hand, was suspicious.
For the past 10 days I’ve survived on 4 to 6 hours of sleep a day, 1 to 2 very irregular meals a day, and called upon more mental and emotional energy than I knew I had.
Felt like I returned from scout camp. Or nazi camp. Ok maybe not nazi camp. I’m guessing people don’t actually return from nazi camp to blog. So yes, a really long and multi-tasking kind of scout camp.
But It wasn’t scout camp, either. It was delivering Malaysia’s Largest Youth Lifestyle Festival, YOUTH’09.
And my mind is still suspicious.
After all the punishing I put myself through, instead of ‘crashing’, I leapt out of bed at 7am, lay around thinking for an hour, did a bunch of chin-ups, and here I am, the only one in the office, blogging like you’re listening.
I know there’s a huge mess to clean up. And loads of post event work with clients, press, partners, volunteers, youths etc to follow up with. The road ahead is long.
Yet, I feel fine.
YOUTH’09 has re-affirmed that everything can be resolved if you’re looking for solutions. It has also re-affirmed to me that the practice of patience, kindness, and compassion always wins.
There’s also so much good stuff to reflect upon, soak in, and tie up in my head. And of course, the business direction for 2009 will be a real adventure.
So why is my mind is suspicious?
I admit, there is a part of me which wonders when I will give up, burn out, or get really beaten. Because really, the journey has just begun.
But I also know that it is this self-doubt, suspicious inner skeptic, which is the real challenge, not anything else. I know it’s this suspicion which prevents people from pushing through to achieve what they intend to. And I know, if I keep moving forward in spite of suspicion, nothing can stop me.
Thank you, friends, youths, volunteers, partners, and team for believing. Couldn’t have done it without you. Will write a proper thank you soon. Will clean up the office now.
Photo by Solabug