My hand clutched on to the kitchen cleaver, even after the 5 burly weapon-wielding men left my house. I wasn’t relieved. The skies were still dark, and I had a lot of explaining to do to.
Last night was a bit of a mess, and I’ll have to start from the beginning…
You see, I’ve been living alone for almost a year now, and my house has never given me any trouble. I’m not a superstitious kinda guy either.
But my imagination was a little more active, knowing about recent attempted break-ins at my neighbour’s.
I thought about this as I arrived home, half past ten at night. The thunderstorm had just died down.
I was greeted with my remote control failing to open my automatic gate… the storm must’ve cut my electricity. So I parked my car outside my house, and climbed in.
After some circuit board groping, I got the lights back up, and went upstairs.
Conveniently, I found that none of the lights worked in my room, and I’m not very good at using bathrooms in the dark, so I went to the next room… where I saw the bathroom light on… and the bathroom door locked from the inside. Strange.
I never use this bathroom.
So I applied a bit of brute force. The door didn’t budge. I called my parents to ask if they (or anyone) came into my house while I was at work. My mom said no.
I knocked on the bathroom door. Then the lights went out again.
The possibility of dangerous intruders hiding in my house drove me straight into my car, speeding to the neighbourhood guardhouse… they sensed my urgency and transferred it into their walkie-talkies, which were already busy with noise.
Guess what! A figure was spotted climbing about my house!
We all rushed back to my house, as a security team with batons, shotguns, and flashlights stormed my garden. I felt a bit safer, and very excited.
Then 5 of them proceeded indoors. I followed these 5 armed men, searching every corner of the ground floor.
Clear. We headed to the bathroom upstairs…
They couldn’t open the bathroom door either. So I went downstairs to find a key. I found myself alone downstairs, and grabbed the closest weapon I could find, a kitchen cleaver. I felt a bit safer, kinda like how a butcher feels, I guess.
I returned to the locked bathroom door with a tub full of keychains (also doubles as secondary weapon). It was time to open the door to evil!
… It took them a while to find the right key. And when we finally opened the bathroom door, it was empty.
Very soon, the possibility of dangerous intruders gave way to the possibility of a faulty lock.
The security team looked a bit disappointed, so I let them search my house one more time, before waving goodbye.
My phone rings, it’s dad asking me what’s going on. As I wasn’t very keen on spending the night at my place, in case of more faulty locks, I told him I would come over to his place and explain, and that all the action for one night, was over.
Here I am now, happy to know I have a responsive, well-prepared security team in my neighbourhood. It was nice to have a moment of action, and only in hindsight, a bit of comedy.
Stupid moment #1
Security guard shines torch into my room and shouts that my room has been ransacked! I had to tell him that it is normally like that.
Stupid moment #2
Fat security guard encounters difficulty climbing over my backyard fence to check the back alley, drops his bamboo club into my pond, and I had to retrieve his weapon for him, as he couldn’t climb back in.
Stupid moment #3
The figure reported climbing about my house was actually me climbing over my automatic gate in the first place.
Special thanks to the security team of Damansara Indah, and to my ever-vigilant neighbours.